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Ten Commandments for Good Manners

Which is your favorite?

I had the pleasure to speak at a lovely Mother-Daughter Tea recently in Mahoning and Lorain Counties. The hostesses were thoughtful and created a beautifully decorated table with lovely homemade sandwiches, cookies and tea. I shared many thoughts that afternoon, but the questions from the audiences kept returning to one point - rules of Good Manners.

With our lifestyle of today I wanted to share them with you, my Patch readers. We can try to achieve some of them with our own master goal just how wonderful that would be. So here they are..

  • Thou Shalt Speak with Kindness and Caution
  • Thou Shalt Not Criticize or Complain
  • Thou Shalt Be Punctual
  • Thou Shalt Not Embarrass Others
  • Thou Shalt Act and Look Your Best
  • Thou Shalt Be Thyself
  • Thou Shalt say “Thank you”
  • Thou Shalt Give Compliments
  • Thou Shalt Not Be Boastful, Arrogant or Loud
  • Thou Shalt Listen Before Speaking

Now that you have read them, this won’t be hard, right? Currently my favorite is Thou Shalt Not Embarrass Others, the very essence of using good manners.

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Amanda Harnocz (Editor) May 4, 2012 at 07:06 pm
A comment was deleted for violating our terms of use.
Ed Fisher May 4, 2012 at 08:48 pm
My folks taught me manners. Manners are a part of respect for each other. But we live a a graceless age, where respect is ignored. We flip each other off, act like jerks toward each other, even calling the President names. My Dad had no use for JFK, but after he was elected, Dad said we must always respect the President. Those days are gone for sure. Respect, and consequently manners, are disappearing.
tom m May 4, 2012 at 09:10 pm
ed I agree with you about people not calling the president names. it was a bad habit picked up from all those democrats that kept calling president Bush names everyday for years .......and the democrats did it so much it has became the norm
Ed Fisher May 4, 2012 at 10:31 pm
that's ludicrous. not sure the Democrats can shoulder all the blame. Lot of peanut jokes made back in the 70's. but placing all the blame on "the other guy" is really the norm now, is it not ?
John McMillan May 5, 2012 at 12:07 am
You're right Ed, that comment was ludicrous. That particular poster loves to blame everything on those he doesn't agree with. Lots of times I am shocked to hear what people say about whoever is President at the moment; we have really lost our regard for common courtesy and respect for each other.
John McMillan May 5, 2012 at 12:13 am
It was deleted, but still shows up on the main page in the comments section...any way you can delete the offensive comment there also?
joe simonton May 5, 2012 at 12:34 am
lol ed you threw out a lets not insult our wonderful socialist president comment and tom slammed it in your face and your come back is peanut jokes (real weak) those were just jokes back then all the way up to Bill clinton not insults.
I remember senator Reid calling bush a loser and then a liar and refused to apologize and congressman stark called him a murderer and it continues today with obama calling bush unpatriotic
James Thomas May 5, 2012 at 01:05 am
We can only be responsible for ourselves in living the golden rule. Not only doing unto others what you would have them do unto you, but especially in Not Doing unto others that which you would not have done to you (and to the leader of your preferred political party). I do believe that the President is the President, even if I did not vote for them.
Teresa Sroka May 5, 2012 at 01:52 pm
Good manners will always be the backbone of a civil society, thanks for the wonderful article!
Ed Fisher May 5, 2012 at 10:24 pm
My comments referred to the office of the President, whoever that may be. simonton, you simple-minded post underscores your inability to understand my point at all. and your attack deserves no respect.
Nikki Ferrell (Editor) May 5, 2012 at 10:51 pm
Hey, everyone - let's stick to the topic at hand and respect our fellow readers. We want this to be a welcoming forum for everyone!
tom m May 5, 2012 at 11:51 pm
ed your reply does not show good manners
Debbie S. May 6, 2012 at 12:48 am
And tom m - PLEASE respect Patch TOS and use your first AND LAST name. Following the rules is part of good manners.
tom m May 6, 2012 at 01:32 am
Debbie my response to ed was about the rude comment HE posted about Joe Simonton "you simple-minded post " to me he was not displaying good manners
Debbie S. May 6, 2012 at 01:39 am
I wasn't commenting on your response. I am commenting on the fact that you have been posting for weeks using only the user name "tom m" which violates Patch terms of service requiring use of your actual first and last name. Thanks in advance for correcting this oversight on your part.
tom m May 6, 2012 at 02:09 am
sorry my full name is being used by 2 other people at the moment and 3 is a crowd .......but thank you for being the TOS police I will sleep better tonite just knowing you are standing watch
joe simonton May 6, 2012 at 02:31 am
What gives deb its ok for ed to say my posts are simple minded and you have no problem with that tos violation but a user with a first name you find worse (and you were going by Debbie S until december yourself) PS thank you tom
Debbie S. May 7, 2012 at 01:20 am
Joe - If Ed feels that your posts are simple-minded, that's his opinion and as far as I can tell, not a TOS violation.
Tom - A community works better when everyone follows the rules. As citizens in an online community like this one, it is everyone's responsibility to call foul when rules are broken and bring it politely to someone's attention when it can be easily fixed, not sit by and assume someone else will say it. I didn't make the rules at Patch, and as Joe pointed out, I didn't realize the rule was in place myself until Stow Patch editor Amanda brought it to my attention, at which point I modified my account to be in compliance. (This was very shortly after I joined Patch, by the way, Joe). Whether or not I agree, Patch has made the rule and many others have been asked to comply or, choosing not to, have deleted their accounts. Your comments on many other articles are pretty critical of and condescending toward people who don't follow rules, so I'm surprised you think that the rules don't apply to you in this case and it's ok for you to blatantly violate Patch TOS. But my obligation as a Patch citizen is done. I have pointed out the problem to you and will continue to report you to Patch so they can deal with you themselves.
joe simonton May 7, 2012 at 01:51 am
Debbie go back and hide in your little white colonial on Saybrooke Boulevard knowing that in the last 4 months you have complained 23 times about TOS violations about gasp peoples names ...I am sure John Jr is so proud of you .....
CFCSParent May 7, 2012 at 12:25 pm
All of these comments just prove the point of the article, or shall I remind you?
Thou Shalt Speak with Kindness and Caution Thou Shalt Not Criticize or Complain Thou Shalt Be Punctual Thou Shalt Not Embarrass Others Thou Shalt Act and Look Your Best Thou Shalt Be Thyself Thou Shalt say “Thank you” Thou Shalt Give Compliments Thou Shalt Not Be Boastful, Arrogant or Loud Thou Shalt Listen Before Speaking
Troy McClure May 7, 2012 at 12:53 pm
Joe, there's a seat open for you in English class since it's obvious you failed the part in elementary school when they taught about using punctuation.
Troy McClure May 7, 2012 at 12:54 pm
You can thank television and the internet for the explosion of rudeness.
People act like tough guys pounding away on the keyboard. And too many TV shows targeting the younger demographic have been displaying how cool it is to be disrespectful to adults -- and people in general.
joe simonton May 7, 2012 at 02:51 pm
yes CFCSParent we know what the article is about, Debbie has left 3 comments complaining only about the fact that people are not using their full name (which if she responds to you she will remind you also) but if that's all she has to contribute is TOS complaints, I fear she thinks of herself as "the savior of Rome"
Note Article
Just a short thought to get the word out quickly about anything in your neighborhood.
Share something with your neighbors. Write a new post... What's up? Make an announcement, speak your mind, or sell something
Nikki Ferrell (Editor) June 17, 2013 at 01:57 pm
Yes, there is! You can find the agenda here: http://www.beachwoodohio.com/agendacenter
Ginny Wykoff May 30, 2013 at 02:29 pm
This should be a great evening. Steve Berry, is one of the greatest authors of my decade along withRead More James Patterson. They both have done their homework in research and story-telling. I would love to listen to him, however, I will not be in the area that week. It would be wonderful if he were invited to the Heights area, either Legacy, Beachwood, Cleveland Hts., because he would bring down the house with fans. Thank you, again. Love his tales.