Here are this week's weirdest police calls, reports and charges. All information was provided by police reports from departments in Patch communities. Where arrests or charges are mentioned, it does not indicate a conviction.

Eventful day in the Falls — Cuyahoga Falls Police responded to two bizarre calls on July 12.

First, a Discount Drug Mart security guard saw a man place several items in his bag and walk out of the store. The guard stopped him and found that the man tried to take undershirts, boxer briefs, socks and several groceries. Police cited him for theft.

That night, a woman told police she saw a man masturbating in the PetSmart parking lot. She got his license plate number, but he had driven off by the time police arrived.

Arrested with an argument — A Bedford Heights man voiced his opinion loud and clear July 15 before and after and officer took him to the Brecksville Police station.

The officer saw the man driving 20 miles per hour over the speed limit at 2:37 a.m. on Interstate 77. The man lit a cigarette after the officer instructed him not to. He argued over his speed and told police he did not care what they had to say once he arrived at the station.

His charges included operating a vehicle under the influence, test refusal, speeding and driving in marked lanes. He was also charged with possession of marijuana for two bags found in his car.

Decorative destruction — An Akron woman used an assortment of garden decorations for a purpose that had nothing to do with plants or veggies.

Stow Police said she used the decorations to damage the windshields of two vehicles on July 11 while they were parked in the driveway of a home on Crown Point Drive. She caused nearly $500 in damage between the vehicles and the decorations. The woman had an active warrant out for her arrest and had been suspected of drinking, police said.

Make-up bandit — A woman told Strongsville Police that somebody broke into her apartment on July 13 or 14, but not to steal any of her expensive belongings.

Instead, the intruder went for her make-up. She told police it had clearly been used when she returned. She had a previous break-in, so officers gave her a few tips to prevent such occurrences in the future.